The month of December is synonymous with giving. All the hype and build up with Black Friday, Small Business Saturday, Cyber Monday leads us into a buying frenzy that more times than not spirals us out of control. So why all the hassle to give. What does giving mean to you? I know what it means to me. Years ago our family decided giving gifts for Christmas didn’t really fit into our core ethos. We are family of caregivers, donators, lovers and supports. Material things never really resonated with us. So, we find the time to give our time.

Six weeks ago I was introduced to a group in Denver metro area that takes giving to a whole new level. Lucky Bikes Re-cyclery thrives on its group of caring and giving volunteers to provide knowledge, leadership, and guidance to empower at-risk and disadvantage youth that want to use the bicycle as a tool to foster positive life skills, healthy development, and a sense of fun and adventure. The new and used bike shop helps fund the greater mission of Trips for Kids Denver Metro engaging with their Ride, Earn a Bike and Youth at Work Programs.

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Being introduced to this group provided a local space I could commit some time and give my knowledge and passion for bikes to people that clearly shared the same ideals. I first started by visiting the shop and getting to know some of the youth in their programs. Some were shy, other’s the complete opposite, but all shared the same sense of purpose the shop provided them. A place to gather and learn all around the simple and timeless human powered machine.

About 2 weeks later I helped volunteer my emcee skills at their annual fundraiser where myself and 6 of the youth in the program led a fun skit showcasing the effects of the programs. The kids were great and shined when it came time to tell their stories.

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The best experience so far came on December 3rd when we gathered all the volunteer staff along with 50 bikes, helmets and locks and led a bike giving showcase to youth in need of bikes for the holidays. They were used bikes that were donated to the shop, but the smiles clearly showed they were new to them. We led them through bike maintenance and safety workshops to ensure they knew how to work on the bikes and how to be safe on the open roads. It was truly a powerful experience as some kids were getting their first bikes and taking their very first pedal strokes!

The impact that this program has far surpasses any emotion from simply giving a gift. Giving my time for this program means making an impression in these kid’s lives that will last a lifetime. The bike is simple freedom, something many of these kids don’t realize they have. The emotion of the program was eloquently documented in the following video, A Promise. 

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I made a pedal powered promise to help Lucky Bikes and Trips for Kids. If this resonates with you consider giving to make an impact this holiday season. If you are based in Colorado/Denver area you can donate HERE. If elsewhere consider donating to a local Trips for Kids Chapter

I never knew I was going to be a professional cyclist. It was never a dream or something I told my friends. Until, one day, it happened. I wasn’t chasing victories or glory or fame, I was chasing a feeling. I want to take you into why I pursued professional cycling for the past decade.  

Close your eyes and think back to that time you first learned how to ride a bike. Your balance a little off, but wobbling up to speed you begin to gain control. You can steer, pedal and point the bike wherever you want to go. All of a sudden before you realize it, you can’t see your house anymore, the exact place that represented the center of your life. All of a sudden, you are the center of you.

If you’re anything like me, that feeling you get, that amalgamation of joy, anxiety, fear and excitement all smashed together is one of the biggest rushes a human being can ever have. It’s liberating. It’s freedom.

We begin to chase it. I began to chase it. Not figuratively, yet quite literally, on my bike. I chased this feeling around the globe. First I rode out of my neighborhood, then my city, county, state, country, continent and eventually spent a decade doing laps around the world.  

But that thrill of going further and further away began to dull. I started to realize as much as I was chasing a feeling I was also running away. And in doing this I was always running into the future with one eye in the rear view mirror. At some point it was all going to catch up with me. And it did.

So I stopped racing my bike, I quit. I quit to pursue instead of chase. I quit to engage instead of run away. I quit to stop focusing on the future while simultaneous lamenting the past. I quit to find out who I am, not who others want me to be.

I was once told, “the only thing we have to do in life is die, everything else is a choice.” Staying in cycling and chasing that feeling of hope was a conscious decision. As hard and masochistic as this sport can be the highs are unlike any other experience I have had, yet so are the lows. 

It was ultimately the tumultuous path of a pro cyclist that left me craving a sense of what was beyond the handlebars. No longer did I want to live a life behind bars.

 However, as I realize the significance the bike has had in my life I recognize that my pro cycling career will be a sliver of who I am 50 years from now, but the bike, the bike will always be by my side. 

I ride slower these days. My bike is my medicine, not my fuel. When I was a pro, my whole identity was wrapped up in how fast and how hard I could go.  When I first retired, I had to let go of my bike for awhile in order to move on. I had to burn the ships. I had to completely surrender to ensure I had no way to go back. Eleven years was a long time to dedicate to one thing. I was done and I didn’t allow myself the option of going back. But now, in a time where life is throwing all sorts of new challenges my way, the bike helps find rhythm in this beautiful dance of life.

Going down the wild road of self exploration isn’t an easy way. It makes you ask yourself the hard questions, remove distractions from your life, and have a calm and present state of mind. I still don’t know who I am, nor am I sure I really want to know. I want to continue to evolve and, in time, pass that along to my children. They sheer beauty of human evolution.

As a dear friend recently told me, “without the ashes, the phoenix is just a bird sticking it’s head out of the dirt.” If you’re having trouble letting go, remove those things that attach you, and attack life with nothing holding you back. Only then will the ashes subside and you will rise to the occasion.